After 17 seasons of highs and lows in the professional peloton, David Millar is hanging up his wheels for good.

“The irony is I no longer fit in,” Millar told the Guardian. “The team has become an identity for a rider; before, a rider would transcend the team. It’s become robotic. I liked the dysfunctionality, the cult-ness, the randomness. Obviously that led to the criminal aspect, the corruption, the madness, but I didn’t know that when I fell in love with it.”

Millar’s retirement has been coming for a while, after the Brit announced his decision to retire at the end of 2014 all the way back in October of last year. It is poetic justice it would seem, that just like his career, there were plenty of highs and lows in 2014.

“It’s been a happy year but it’s been a bit of a struggle, which is mainly why I’m stopping. I’m in a place where I can appreciate it,” Millar explained. “I love it, but it’s not overwhelming. There are no bad feelings or regrets, it’s just time. Form is becoming harder and harder to get and training is harder to make productive.”

Millar experienced immense pride when he rode for Scotland in the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow, but suffered heartbreak when he wasn’t picked to ride the Tour de France due to illness.

Millar finished his WorldTour career at the Vuelta a Espana before riding one last World Championships for Great Britain. 16 stages into the Vuelta, he was involved in a horrific high-speed crash that has resulted in two broken fingers and a broken rib. It was during that crash that Millar knew his decision to retire was the right one.

“It was the biggest impact crash I’ve ever had. My front wheel and bars hit a bollard. You get home with a broken rib, all the skin off your left side and two broken fingers, and you can’t pick up the kids. I’ve always had a Houdini-like ability to come out of things, so when you do that in one of your last races, you think it’s time to get out.”